Okay, apparently nuclear power plants have these things called “steam dryers.” And apparently sometimes these dryers get things called “cracks,” and these “cracks” are apparently not good. They’re not good because cracks are like long skinny holes in the side of your dryer. Turns out Vermont Yankee has sixteen of these cracks that went unreported to the Atomic Safety and Licensing Board, and now, gosh darn it, it’s too late to amend the report.

But according to corporate voice box Rob Williams none of this lack of reportage is the fault of Entergy, owners of Vermont Yankee. That Rob Williams denied risk and responsibility would hardly be worth reporting.

But the reasons Williams gave in this particular instance are surprisingly instructive.

Entergy had no responsibility to report these sixteen cracks because “they were not new and had been discovered using enhanced inspection techniques.” Now, you might think that it wouldn’t matter how long-standing the crack — a long skinny hole is a long skinny hole.

But you would be wrong. It seems these cracks were “old,” and therefore analagous to a pre-existing condition for the plant, relieving the corporation involved of all responsibility to report their existence.

But that’s only the half of it. More than anything else, it was the method of discovery that relieved Yankee of its obligation to report: the cracks were found using “enhanced inspection techniques.”

And we all know that any intel secured through enhanced techniques is classified for reasons of national security, and inadmissible in a court of law. And they said Donald Rumsfeld had balls.

Rob Williams, you make Rummy look like a eunuch.